THE BOYS IN THE BOAT - film / by Stephanie Puls

MEH

How did director George Clooney make this remarkable true story about a group of young men learning very quickly to row and winning a gold medal so dull?! The Boys in the Boat is paint-by-number film making. And to release it during awards season when there’s so many brilliant films around was dumb. Good one, delusional Hollywood executives!

  • Young man from poor origins trying to pull himself up by his bootstraps who, you won’t believe it, is handsome … TICK

  • Beautiful young woman by his side … will she distract or inspire him?! … TICK

  • Wise old man who doesn’t say much but when he does it’s somehow profound and insightful … TICK

  • A privileged enemy who tries to unfairly stop the fairytale story in its tracks … TICK

  • Team struck by adversity in the form of a suddenly sick member … will he come good in time to row for the gold medal?! … TICK

This film is so vanilla I could barely stay interested for most of it which really makes no sense when you consider that the true story on which it’s based is really quite cool. To be fair, my interest did pick up at the end to some degree but the reality is, Hollywood ain’t making films about rowing teams that came second so we knew they were going to win.

Give The Boys in the Boat a miss I reckon. How sad.

It’s getting mixed reviews - two stars from The Guardian and a more positive 3.5 stars from The Age. Check out one of these if you’d like to know more about the storyline but tbh I wouldn’t bother.

The Boys in the Boat is in cinemas now. It’s rated PG and runs for 124 minutes.